Friday, December 30, 2011

"Praise God" for all of man's ingenuity and technology.

Me and Alexey
What an awesome morning!

I coudn't sleep after 630 or so. So, I got up. As usual I first went to the computer and started my daily routine of signing in to all the various social networks email accounts, blogs, etc.

I had recently signed up on a social network called "vkontakte.ru" (vK.ru). It's sort of a eastern European Facebook. Many of our orphan outreach team's Ukrainian members are there. I can easily communicate with them in English (as they speak the language or several languages fluently).

Usually, if I communicate with kids it is through our team mentors (90% of the time). My Russian is "ochen ploho!"... very bad. I am so thankful for our mentors and the way they serve these children by helping us to teach and communicate. Mostly, i'm thankful for their patience with my poor language skills. Without complaining they take the time to translate and correct my English into Russian.

However, on vK.ru, I also found several of the kids that we spend time with each summer and December.

So this morning I added a few of the recent "graduates" - these are 16-17 year-olds that are typically in a trade school.

I found my friend Alexey and added him to my friend list. Within just a few moments I hear a "clack". I got a message from him!

Now, my browser of choice is Google Chrome and I have Google Translate (GT) functioning in the background. In an instant I see the Russian become English! I quickly opened a new tab and clicked my link to GT. I tapped a message and copy/pasted it to reply to Alexey.

Then I asked, "Do you see my response in Russian or English?"

He responds..."Russian, of course. ???" Like, "Well duh!"
Like me, Alexey is
a goalkeeper also.

All I'm saying is "Praise God" for all of man's ingenuity and technology. He has made it possible for me to stay in contact with kids that I know and love 5,000 miles away! God is good. Always. All the time.












P.S. he wants to know when we are coming back. ;)

Friday, December 16, 2011

Dec. 2011 Camp Video


Slide/video compilation from our latest trip to minister the orphans at the Gorodskoi Children's Home in Simferopol, Crimea/Ukraine.

Thursday, December 15, 2011

5 WAYS YOU CAN BECOME AN EVERYDAY HERO

(reposted from Michael Hyatt Leadership/http://michaelhyatt.com/)

It’s easy to underestimate the power of one person’s influence. We think, What can I do? I am only one person. Even when I was the CEO of a company I often felt this way.

The truth is that each of us wields far more power than we could possibly imagine. However, most of us have never discovered this—or we have forgotten it.

A few years ago, my wife Gail and I saw a powerful movie called Freedom Writers, starring Hillary Swank. It is based on the true story of Erin Gruwell, a rookie school teacher assigned to a tough, newly-integrated school in Long Beach. The students are mostly Black, Latino, and Asian gangbangers who hate her even more than they hate each other.

Everyone had given up on these kids—even the school. The teacher who hired her exhorts her to forget about educating these hoodlums. The most she can hope for is to teach them something about obedience and not get too involved.

Even her Dad, who had been a liberal activist, pleads with her to find a new job. Fortunately for her students, Erin doesn’t have enough experience to listen to “reason” or be so cynical.

Instead, she begins to listen to the students in a way that no one has ever listened to them before. She takes on a second job—and eventually, a third—so that she can buy them books, take them on field trips, and introduce them to Holocaust survivors. She doesn’t let a lack of resources keep her from doing the right thing.

She also teaches them about the power of writing. She introduces them to The Diary of Anne Frank and requires them to journal about their experiences. Through this simple exercise, their lives are radically changed.

This experience was another reminder that each of us has the power to change our world. We may think we are powerless, but we are not.

Power is simply the courage to confront evil, take a stand for what is right, and then act to make things different.

This is all that Erin did and look at the ripple effect—the lives of her students, the example to other teachers, a book, a movie, and the list goes on.

The movie really impacted both of us. I want to be more like Erin. I have more power than I sometimes give myself credit for.

So do you.

Here are five ways you can exercise it:

1. Stop ignoring the evil you encounter. The older I get, the easier it is to close my eyes to poverty, pain, injustice, and evil. I can order my life, so that I am never put in a position of seeing anything unpleasant. I can look without seeing. I’m continue to pray daily that “God gives me eyes to see and ears to hear.” You can’t be a change agent if you don’t perceive the needs around you.

2. Stop over-thinking your response to it. I have an author friend who has a policy about giving to homeless people. He told me, “Every time I used to encounter a homeless person, I would go through all kinds of mental gyrations. If I give money to this person, will they just use it to buy alcohol or drugs? Why don’t they just get a job? Maybe it would be better if I offered them some work rather than just give them money?”
Then he read the words of Matthew 5:42, “Give to him who asks you, and from him who wants to borrow from you do not turn away.” He then decided to make a deal with God.

Now, whenever he encounters a homeless person or a beggar, he gives them all the cash in his pocket. Sometimes that’s two dollars. Sometimes it’s a hundred. Regardless, he decided to stop over-thinking it and start living the Gospel. The money he gives is his gift to God.

Frankly, I like his approach. I can come up with a thousand-and-one excuses why I shouldn’t get involved. I can way over-think my response. While I may not be able to do everything, I can do something. And something is usually better than nothing.

3. Stop complaining about your lack of resources. Erin couldn’t get the school to give books to her students. So, she got a second job and bought the books herself. The students wanted to bring Miep Gies, the Dutch woman whose family hid Anne Frank and her family, to the school to lecture. The school didn’t have the budget, so the students held a series of fund-raisers to come up with the money.
What’s my excuse? No matter what my station in life is, it’s easy to think I don’t have enough resources. My guess is that even Bill Gates feels inadequate in the face of the needs he encounters. Resources are never—and I mean never—the problem. The biggest challenge is simply my will to act.

4. Start asking, “What is the right thing to do?” Let’s face it. The world needs heroes. It needs people who will be courageous and act on principle. But where can we find such people? Maybe the answer is closer than we think. The truth is it can start—and must start—with us.
God has providentially put each of us exactly where we are. We need to ask, “Why am I here?” “What does God want me to do in this situation?” “What is the right thing to do?”

We need to be like Esther in the Bible who was in a very difficult situation. She had a very prominent social platform. She had everything to lose, including her life, if things didn’t go well. But her uncle reminded her saying, “you have come to the kingdom for such a time as this” (Esther 4:14).

5. Be in the moment and act. I can’t afford to wait for my circumstances to be perfect. I will never have enough experience. I will never have the resources I need. I need to stop whining and just do it! Someone else is waiting for a hero. I may be the best opportunity they have. I may be their answer to prayer.
So, you may not be able to help everyone. But you can help someone. You have more power than you can imagine.

If you haven’t seen Freedom Writers, I encourage you to do so. It will inspire you about the impact one person can have on the world.

Some of my favorite December trip photos from

Linda and Vika

Me and Yana

Arthur and Sasha in Saul's armor
King Arthur
Queen Sveta


Vika 
Akmed

Team Sim 12/2011

With Anya and Vika at the Central Internacht

Three old ladies

Nastya and Nastya

sasha and Kolya

Angelika and Sveta

Linda and I with Aida

My favorite "1"
Aida wanted a message written on her arm. (She's peeking)

Kolya, me, Akmed, and Sasha hangin.


Me and "Azhmed"

Violetta

Linda, Arthur and their group

I laughed so hard. Joseph's brothers roughing him him up.

Linda and her baby


Me and Violetta

Me and some of the group

Linda and Angelika

Nastya and some little ones

Me and Adile

Little ones

Akmed

zhora

Nastya's

Christy and Linda

Sasha and Sasha

Wednesday, December 14, 2011

Dear TeamSim friends:

The December 2011 team just returned from Simferopol a few days ago. What a blessing the trip was. My wife, Linda, joined me for the first time in this ministry. Along with Donelson Chuirch of Christ member Christy Blazer. Our 3-man team joined with some of our Ukrainian team members Anastasia (Nastya) Skovorodnykova, Sasha Lifentseva, Masha Yermochenkova, Violetta Alimova, and our dear friend and lead mentor Arthur Kazaryan. 


TeamSim - December 2011 (L-R: Nastya S., Joel, Linda, Sasha,
Christy, Masha, and Arthur Kazaryan.
Together we hosted as many as 42 orphaned children at the Simferopol City Children's Home (Gorodskoi Detskyi Dom) directed Mrs. Yelena Nabiyevna. We met each afternoon for a little over 2 hours. We taught lessons about the transforming power of God’s grace and love through Romans 12:2. We also played games and worked on crafts together.

Violetta with her kids

Stuck on the elevator
One of my "1's"
Nastya with some little ones.


We were blessed to see many of the same children that we have come to know and love at the children’s home. Hugs were being given everywhere as the unconditional love of Christ overflowed onto the children and staff from our team and mentors.
Linda and Arthur with their group


In addition we spent several hours visiting some of our past team members, Anya Goliakova and Viktoria Vdovychencko, who are now on staff at the Simferopol Central Internacht for Girls. The government-run boarding school is for orphaned, abandoned and at-risk girls ages 5-17. We were able to meet with the director and secure an invitation to work with the children in that facility. Please keep Anya and Vika in your prayers. Weekly suicide attempt is a common event there. Anya and Vika have a monumental task in showing these girls their value in Christ. It was a blessing to pray over them as a team.


L-R: Linda, Joel, Anya G, Christy, Arthur, Vika


One highlight for me personally was hearing from my old friend Igor. He was 14 when we first met at Camp Satera in Alushta. He was incorrigible. Over the next few years, we worked at the Gvardiskoi Village orphanage where he lived. I saw a growing and maturing in Igor. He is now living and attending trade school in Kherson. He regularly talks with Nastya by phone. Ironically he often encourages her when she is struggling by telling her God will handle it. I was so blessed to talk with him by phone. Fatyma Alimova showed me a recent photo on her cell phone. He looks so grown up at 18. God has his hands on him.

Return trip planned: In June 2012 I’ll be leading a team to return to Simferopol to continue and expand the ministry there. The tentative plan is to depart in early June for a trip lasting 15 days. The team will plan to minister to children in two facilities: The Gorodskoi Children’s Home (Detskyi Dom) and the Central Internacht. The team recruiting goal is 6 team members with 6-8 mentors.

Basics:
Team recruiting goal: 6 members (US); 6-8 Mentors (UKR)
Tentative dates: June 5-19
Approx. Funding needed: $3200 (per person)
Funding deadlines:
- Initial deposit ($250) Jan 15
- 50% - March 15
- 100% - April 15

Please begin prayerfully considering joining the team. The deadline for joining is January 15. Team training begins Janauary 15.

Please contact me for more detailed information. We’ll hold an informational meeting in late December or early January of which I’ll communicate the exact date soon. In teh meantime. feel free to contact me anytime by phone, text, or email.

You CAN make a difference in the life of an abandoned or at-risk child, today. Join us. Change the way you see and think.

In Him.
Joel
Joel Butts
Orphan outreach ministry volunteer
and partner with Donelson Church of Christ
and YouthReach International

prophet1961@bellsouth.net
615-429-3320

Websites:
http://www.donelsonchurch.org
http://www.youthreach.org

December 2011 Trip Report

Dear TeamSim friends:

The December 2011 team just returned from Simferopol a few days ago. What a blessing the trip was. My wife, Linda, joined me for the first time in this ministry. Along with Donelson Chuirch of Christ member Christy Blazer. Our 3-man team joined with some of our Ukrainian team members Anastasia (Nastya) Skovorodnykova, Sasha Lifentseva, Masha Yermochenkova, Viloetta Alimova, and our dear friend and lead mentor Arthur Kazaryan. 


Together we hosted as many as 42 orphaned children at the Simferopol City Children's Home (Gorodskoi Detskyi Dom) directed Mrs. Yelena Nabiyevna. We met each afternoon for a little over 2 hours. We taught lessons about the transforming power of God’s grace and love through Romans 12:2. We also played games and worked on crafts together.

Our theme was “Focus your attention on God and you will be changed from the inside out.” Each day we built upon the foundation of being transformed by the renewing of your mind and how we aren’t capable of transforming on our own. We need God’s help. Once we ask for and receive God’s changing power we can begin to transform those around us; in our homes, our friends, our community, and our world.

We were blessed to see many of the same children that we have come to know and love at the children’s home. Hugs were being given everywhere as the unconditional love of Christ overflowed onto the children and staff from our team and mentors.

In addition we spent several hours visiting some of our past team members, Anya Goliakova and Viktoria Vdovychencko, who are now on staff at the Simferopol Central Internacht for Girls. The government-run boarding school is for orphaned, abandoned and at-risk girls ages 5-17. We were able to meet with the director and secure an invitation to work with the children in that facility. Please keep Anya and Vika in your prayers. Weekly suicide attempt is a common event there. Anya and Vika have a monumental task in showing these girls their value in Christ. It was a blessing to pray over them as a team.

Return trip planned: In June 2012 I’ll be leading a team to return to Simferopol to continue and expand the ministry there. The tentative plan is to depart in early June for a trip lasting 15 days. The team will plan to minister to children in two facilities: The Gorodskoi Children’s Home (Detskyi Dom) and the Central Internacht. The team recruiting goal is 6 team members with 6-8 mentors.

Basics:
Team recruiting goal: 6 members (US); 6-8 Mentors (UKR)
Tentative dates: June 5-19
Approx. Funding needed: $3200 (per person)
Funding deadlines:
- Initial deposit ($250) Jan 15
- 50% - March 15
- 100% - April 15

Please begin prayerfully considering joining the team. The deadline for joining is January 15. Team training begins Janauary 15.

Please contact me for more detailed information. We’ll hold an informational meeting in late December or early January of which I’ll communicate the exact date soon. In teh meantime. feel free to contact me anytime by phone, text, or email.

You CAN make a difference in the life of an abandoned or at-risk child, today. Join us. Change the way you see and think.

In Him.
Joel



Joel Butts
Orphan outreach ministry volunteer
and partner with Donelson Church of Christ
and YouthReach International

prophet1961@bellsouth.net
615-429-3320

Websites:
http://www.donelsonchurch.org
http://www.youthreach.org

Monday, November 28, 2011

Nov. 29, 2011

You never really know how far-reaching your impact on the world is until you take a bit of a risk and go out on the skinny end of a limb sometimes. Some would call it, "stepping out of the boat."

But it's hard for some folks. Trust for most of us is hard anyway. Add to that trusting a God we've never seen. Well, but then, that's what faith is - trusting in that which we cannot see.

A couple of decades ago I recommitted myself to trying my best to following Christ. But when it came to claiming him to my oldest friends - THAT was tough. At one point though I decided that I just wasn't going to let that stop me. Don't get me wrong - it's still not easy.

I used to coach soccer at many levels. When teaching any new skill or trick, there's always the kid who complains "I can't do it!" A fellow coach put like this; " Well, if it were easy, anyone could do it." Aren't we sometimes like that kid? But what happens if maybe we find that we can do it?

I took this saying to heart. As I began to reveal my faith to others I soon began to discover that some of those oldest friends had come to know Jesus the same as I had.

It's pretty cool to see who we walk beside down the road. It's like after Jesus' death and resurrection. His closest friends we're such sad-sacks. They hadn't heard ANYTHING he'd said! He appeared to many of them. Walked right BESIDE them!

That same day two of them were walking to the village Emmaus, about seven miles out of Jerusalem. They were deep in conversation, going over all these things that had happened. In the middle of their talk and questions, Jesus came up and walked along with them. But they were not able to recognize who he was. He asked, "What's this you're discussing so intently as you walk along?" They just stood there, long-faced, like they had lost their best friend. ~ Luke 24:13-35 (The Message)

 They didn't even recognize him.

Sometimes, I'm walking right beside a brother or a sister and I don't even know it. Somebody I hadn't expected to see live out their life in faith and obedience. It's just cool how God reveals them to me sometimes!

Turns out I was walking right beside one of my best, life-long friends all along.

I have a college friend who teaches elementary school. She and her family sponsor one of my most favorite kids in Ukraine. A girl named Yulia (Julia). She wrote me the other day to tell me about a way that she used our team and efforts to teach a lesson about helping others. It went something like this:

The bulletin board outside her classroom is titled "holiday helpers". She tried to explain the concept of "less fortunate" but they were having trouble getting it.  So she explained as much as she could about what the work and ministry our team provides to orphans in Ukraine.  She told them about Yulia. To her surprise about ten of them wrote how they would help her. She said she cried as she was grading them. "Such precious Angels" she calls them.

Check out what some of them wrote.

"I would like to help Julia by giving her pajamas, toys so it would be a happy Christmas for her. I feel bad for her because I get presents and she doesn't. I would like to visit her to make her feel better."

"I want to give Julia clothes and a stuffed animal. Clothes would keep her warm and maybe a stuffed animal would make her smile and feel safe. I hope it would make her happy and it would make me happy to help her. Merry Christmas Julia!"

"I would try to help Julia. She is a young girl that lives in an orphanage in the Ukraine. I would love to give her a Christmas tree so she could see how pretty one is. I would also like to help her by giving her some cookies, a family, a big house, and lots of food. I would give her those things becasue she doesn't have them."

"I would help Julie by writing this letter to her. I feel bad that she doesn't get the things I do and she is only 12 years old. Maybe reading my letter would help her to feel loved."


So without ever having met any of these East coast third graders we've somehow managed to impact the way they see, and think. You never know who you're walking with. Get out of the boat. Better yet get out on the skinny end of the limb - that's where the best view is if you want to see who you're walking with!

"What is essential is invisible to the eye." Change the way you see and think. Make a list of the of the people who impacted your life.

We leave in 3 days. Can't wait to hug all my friends and those awesome kids.

Peace.

Monday, November 21, 2011

"May the nations be glad and sing for joy..."

My friend Stan Bryan sent this to me. It's a video of a congregation singing his favorite hymn in Donetsk, Ukraine. This came from a Fall Singing Festival. The hymn is entitled "Slavite" or "Praise". You will eventually see Stan leading the singing. BEAUTIFUL!

http://youtu.be/ks_bmxUNd18

Saturday, November 12, 2011

Black Sea Reflections: Update - 12 NOV, 2011

Black Sea Reflections: Update - 12 NOV, 2011: Georges Carillet, President of Commonwealth International University CIU in Simferopol tells about two of our team mentors working in a state-run orphanage. Read more.

Update - 12 NOV, 2011

Anya Goliakova

The excerpt below comes from my friend Georges Carillet. He is President of Commonwealth International University in Simferopol, Ukraine (Crimea). Georges is one of the many contacts I've made there during the years I've spent ministering to orphans there. In fact Georges has indirectly impacted our team's ability to minister in Simferopol. He began teaching the Gospel many years ago through the university he and his wife LaVergne, founded. Several of our team mentors came to know Christ because of Georges and LaVergne.
Below, Georges speaks of two young women who work in a state run orphan facility. Our team worked in this same orphanage in December, 2010. These two young ladies, Anya Goliakova and Viktoria (Vika) Vdovychenko, are also members of our team and have served as YouthReach 12-3-1 Mentors. Please read Georges article and keep Anya and Vika in your prayers.

It is our hope that they will be able to join us this December as we journey to Simferopol.

From Georges Carillet - CIU Newsletter....

Vika Vdovichenko
"Another prayer request: orphans and those who work with them. Our two Disney interns that returned in the summer were looking for work with college students and children. Recently they found work in a state orphanage boarding school in Simferopol. Caring social work is always demanding and stressful, but add to that the corruption that they see and it is almost overwhelming. Allegedly, even the Ministry of Education is using the orphanage school to launder money and otherwise do financially corrupt things. Makes it hard for the kids to get the chance that they need. One of the results: they found most of the kids without soap and shampoo. Hopeful Hearts (Kathy Drane) found out about the need and bought soap and shampoo for the 80 to 100 kids.

By the way, these two young women exemplify the kind of fruit that CIU has been blessed to help cultivate. Disney invited them to become their employees but they chose to return to Ukraine to seek paid ministry positions, of which there are very few and are poorly paid. For several months they were -- as they were when they were our students -- unpaid volunteers working with college students and orphans. Then a "paid ministry" position came up for one of them and then the other at the same orphanage. "Ministry" because these young women understand that that is what God calls them to; "paid" because they are paid something as employees of the state, though not enough to live on. Pray for them and "their children."

One of these 'ministers' came to Christ at CIU and was baptized by me just two years ago (featured in our October 6, 2009 newsletter). Pray for CIU's unique ministry in fulfilling the Great Commission in Ukraine -- making disciples of Christ who make disciples of Christ."

Grace and Peace.
Joel

Thursday, November 3, 2011

God's been busy

Been a while since my last entry. Nothing earth-shattering in my life. Usual day-to-day goings and coming. I am discovering that once you turn 50 years old, every doctor seems to make it their personal goal to poke or prod me or hook me up to some graph-generating,continuous-feed form paper-spewing machine. I've had two examinations/tests Since the middle of October with two or three more to come.

This coming weekend is our annual hayride at my parent's home in Hartsville. 40+ guests are expected to show. Hope the wagon is big enough.

Linda, Christy Blazer and I are still working on preparations for our December Mission to Ukraine. Funding is going well. Nearly done - we think. Waiting for some news on updated costs form YouthReach International. Lesson plans are nearly complete. Some details left to be worked out then we can begin collecting and purchasing goods for crafts and gifts.

We're also waiting to hear who among our regular team of mentors (Local Ukrainian Christians) will be able to join us.

I'm overjoyed that two of our mentors Anya Goliakova and Vika Vdovychenko are back in Simferopol after a year in the US. About a month ago, Anya was blessed with a job opportunity to teach English at the Central Orphanage in that city. Although the job is stressful and, according to Anya, overwhelming at times, she feels God is and will continue to use her in that facility to show the unconditional love of Christ to the 90 some girls living there.

After just 2 weeks she was promoted to the educational department administrative staff as vice principal.

A few weeks later Vika was offered an administrative job in the same orphanage.Within a few short days Vika sent me a message asking for prayers. She already had witnessed one teen girl threatening to attempt suicide. She said in her message that the girls were more interested in sleeping with boys than hearing about the grace of God and His mercy.

Please keep them in your prayers as they serve these orphaned girls. I hope we will have time to visit them and perhaps arrange to work there in the summer.

On a more sad note, I won't be able to spend time with Fatyma Ametova or Anastasia Dudenichenko this trip. This will be the first time in 3 trips that they won't be actively a part of the team. Fatyma has a new job translating and may be in Kiev. Nastya is in Germany working as an au pere.

Aida
Arthur Kazaryan, Our lead mentor and in-country coordinator has purchased some of our transportation fare and David Hennessey of YR has already purchased our airline tickets.

I was also touched to receive from Arthur a photo of one of my favorite kids - Aida. It made my day. I can't wait to see her and introduce her to Linda. She's grown so much just since June!

Only a little less than a month left before departure. Tom Zvirgzds has diligently been teaching us Russian. I just hope I can remember it all. I'm getting exciting about what God has in store for this December mission.

Grace and peace.
=J

Saturday, October 29, 2011

Our funding deadline is here! We need help!


Dear friends,
Thank you for prayerfully supporting Linda, Christy Blazer and I as we strive to reach our funding goal. This weekend marks our funding deadline!  Collectively, as a team, we need approximately $2600.


The amount covers Mentor sponsorships during camp.


Team Sim 12-3-1 Mentor  Anya Goliakova
with  Aida  & Adilia
Our “12-3-1 Mentors” are the backbone of our ministry. They are our local Ukrainian Christian partners who join us in camp. They continue to MINISTER TO ORPHANED CHILDREN ALL YEAR LONG by participating in monthly birthday programs, providing LIFE-GIVING RELATIONSHIP, and by helping us to communicate with the children. Our ministry continues through them long after we Americans return home.


Please visit our website today (link below) and make a “General Team Donation”. Visit Youthreach.org to read more about our 12-3-1 Mentors. MAKE A DIFFERENCE in the LIFE OF A CHILD today! Help us connect a child with a life-long friend who cares.


Team Donation Page


Peace and grace.

Friday, October 7, 2011

Sasha the Boy: A Sad Tale

This came to me from Georges Carillet. Georges is President at Commonwealth International University, a Bible and language college in Simferopol, Crimea (Ukraine). It is being republished with permission.


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
 
Sasha Zmeyev
[Date: Sun, Oct 2, 2011 at 9:34 PM]
Stephen Crane and Sasha the Boy (Zmeyev) Some people are devotees of Stephen Crane's writings and worldview. I am not. But most of us had to at least skim his Red Badge of Courage. 


From time to time we run across a few of his famous quotes, like I did tonight. This prompted me to google him where I found these sad words: "Plagued by financial difficulties and ill health, Crane died of tuberculosis in a Black Forest sanatorium at the age of 28." 


Sasha was not yet 28 when tuberculosis claimed his life two days ago. 


When my cell phone rang and rang, silently vibrating my left thigh, I was too busy to even look at it. It was the last day for the Southeast Christian Church team to be with us, and they were giving us their morning to paint our office reception room and kitchenette. I was racing about trying to keep eight people occupied with paint, paint brushes, rollers, and damp cloths to clean up dripped latex paint. It was apparent that the paint would not cover what the container said it would, and we would run out. 


The idea of eight people standing around with rollers and brushes and no paint was an assault on my organizational abilities. I should have followed my instincts the day before and bought more paint. I felt embarrassment coming on, but there still was time to
avoid it. 


Speeding to Gala where I knew I could find the same kind of paint, I reached into my pocket to see who had been so insistent on trying to reach me. I really hate to look at my phone when I am driving. All the missed calls were from "Sasha the Boy" -- that is how I named him in my phone. There was even a text message from him that I would read later. I figured the call was pretty serious, but ... well, Sasha and I have a long history, going back to when we lived in the Kuibysheva apartment our first eight years here.
------------------------------------
Georges & "Sasha the boy"
I knew Sasha when he was maybe in the 9th or 10th grade. I taught him how to wash cars, starting with our 1987 Opal Senator. I taught him the basics of driving. He taught me not to trust him with the keys -- he said he needed them so he could vacuum the trunk. But after that he slipped away to show off to some of his buddies, driving around the nearby school sports field. I knew that the pocket change from washing my car was important to him, especially given the low wages his mother earned. I gave him three month's probation - no washing my car, no pay. 


I explained why. I hoped he would learn a lesson about trust, trust violated and trust regained. Sasha never knew his father, though his mother knew who it was. I thought I could be fatherly to him. He dreamed of going to culinary school when he graduated. I thought we could help him afford it. 


It never happened. While still a teenager, things really fell apart when his mother died. His mother's friend took him in and rented out his apartment. It would be his to rent out or live in, when he was old enough to sign contracts. 


Both apartments were in the same building where we lived. Sasha expected to get some percentage of the rent, but his guardian denied it to him. We heard her yell at him one day: "You killed your mother. She is dead because of you." Sasha may not have been a model son and student, and though on the mischievous side, he was not a bad boy. No father, no mother, and an exploiting guardian did not bode well for Sasha. 


He thought he would take justice in his own hands: he stole some of the guardian's jewelry. He was going to sell it. He was going to take control of something in his life. I do not know if you can say that he violated trust again, for his guardian did not trust him with anything. He certainly loss any chance for trust and became branded: thief -- biting the hand that fed him .... albeit fed him with rent money from his own apartment. 


If he trusted anyone, it was me. But it was not enough to change the trajectory of his life. Maybe it was not trust at all. His guardian had what she wanted: his rental income. What did she need him for, but trouble? She called the police. Arrested and tried and sentenced, presumably bound for juvenile prison, a final decision consigned him to adult prison. 


A few years later, we moved to our current flat. Sasha surprised us. Knocking at our door was a ghost from the past, materializing in our doorway, completing it in our foyer. He got out of prison early, on good behavior. Somehow he found us. 


He was smiling his winsome boyish smile. But the tale he told us was not boyish at all. He glorified his prison experience, admiring the brotherhood of those who defied the laws to which others were subservient. 


Not so glorious was the resistant strain of tuberculosis that he caught and is so common in Ukrainian prisons. He had been in a TB sanitarium outside of Simferopol but was sent to Simferopol to get some needed medicines. It was not uncommon not too many years ago for a doctor to tell a patient's family what was needed and they were expected to find it in the pharmacies, markets, or wherever.


According to Sasha, the police stopped him and wanted to know where some former prison mate was now. If he knew, he would not tell. He had a code to live by, such as it was among thieves. No snitching, whatever else you do. They hauled him into the police station that was not a full block from where we - and he - used to live. 


They repeatedly put a plastic bag over his head till he would pass out, then wake him with cold water. They tied him to a stool, then repeatedly knocked the stool off its legs. They beat his back and legs black and blue with a hose. 


Sasha's bruises
He was smiling in the telling as if proud of what he had endured without yielding an address. I asked to see the marks. They were there, in bold but fading ink, mostly black, with some yellowing. He had been held for three days. They let him heal some days before releasing him. 


They threatened to blame him for any one of many unsolved murders, send him to prison for a long time, and take over his apartment. We know someone who lost his apartment to the police. This was no idle threat. He was told that something could happen to him and no one would miss him. 


No one cared. 


They gave him some days to tell them what they wanted to know. The story of police threats continues, with police waiting for him to return to his apartment. We returned him to the TB hospital instead. But before he left, I gave him a photocopy of my ID that said I was a member of the UN Human Rights organization. I told him he could tell the police that someone cares and someone would miss him and that it was me. 


The next time he was taken to the police station, he was told that they already knew about his American friend. (Sergei Korniyenko tried to get legal help for Sasha, but it was too late for a doctor to verify how he got the marks on his body. Authorities came to know, though, that Sasha had friends. That was July 2005.) 


Sasha delivering flowers
After release from the hospital, allegedly cured, he found various kinds of work, mostly labor. Most employers did not legally employ him and some exploited him as an ex-prisoner. Some of my colleagues helped him get the documents that everyone is supposed to have, but which were lost or misplaced by his guardian while he was in prison. 


Sasha and Olya
Andrei Taran and Sergei Korniyenko helped Sasha and me with many a missions of mercy. Sasha's story took various twists and turns over the following years. He had a girlfriend, got her pregnant. Andrei, Sergei and I helped him and his partner so that they could keep the baby. LaVerne and I visited Olya in the hospital. 


Andrei drove them to Olya's mother's cottage where they were living. It did not take long to discover that there was no harmony in that home; Sasha was tolerated as the father of the daughter's daughter. But not for long. The odds were against him on the one hand; on the other hand, Sasha the Boy needed to play the man. 


We helped (thanks to benevolence funds from Southeast Christian Church) with several tons of coal to keep the family warm through the winter, mostly for the sake of the baby which Sergei persuaded them that they should keep rather than abort. We tried to help Sasha take responsibility. Each of the three of us guys talked to him from time to time about his responsibilities as a father and 'husband.' 


In less than 18 months, Sasha deserted his 'wife' and daughter, eventually living with another woman and fathering another child. Sasha paid child support, but did not keep in touch with his ex and first daughter. 


The next time I got a call from Sasha, he wanted to give me a free car wash at a private single-bay car wash that helped him put food on the table. By now he was renting out his mother's apartment, but not nearly for what it was worth. I guess that paid the rent of his one-room apartment near the car wash. He wondered if I would be interested in buying the apartment; with no documents to prove clear ownership, I would not even think about it.


Not long after that meeting he called to ask for some money to chase down his (second) 'wife' -- she had taken the baby and returned to her mother's home some hours north of Simferopol. I refused. I told him that he needed to be responsible for his life -- he would need to find another way to deal with his family issues.
------------------------------
When I saw that the call was from Sasha the Boy, I knew I did not have time and little will to talk to him. I had a team to supply with paint. First things first. Anyway, he would just want me to bail him out of some kind of trouble that he brought on himself. The calls were so persistent, I thought I should at least hear what was up. 


My Russian language skills are such that I usually understand what Sasha is saying but am at a loss of Russian words to clearly respond. Besides, Andrei is a no-nonsense sort of person who will tell him to grow up and take responsibility and leave me alone. So I called Andrei to return the call for me. I was off to the college with another ten liters of white paint. 


Come 12:30, we would have a going away and appreciation party for the Southeast team. I knew that my staff would be celebrating my birthday as well. When Andrei called me back, I learned that the call had been from Natasha, not Sasha the Boy. Turned out that the text message was from her, too, identifying herself and asking me to answer the phone. Natasha used Sasha's cell phone to call me -- my number was in it. 


Sasha was in the hospital, and Natasha did not know what to do. She told Andrei that Sasha always talked about "Georges" and how he helped him out. Not knowing what else to do, she called "Georges." (I used to think that maybe he told his friends that he had an American in his pocket because I had bailed him out several times and helped him with loans and gifts. I wondered if the trust I was trying to build was from his perspective an object of exploitation.) 


Sasha had been sick with TB for two months but would not go see a doctor. He started drinking. A month ago he got worse, but he only drank more. Then he got so bad that his heart was hurting and Natasha called an ambulance. The doctor said that one lung was not working and only 25% of the other lung functioned. 


He was dying. His organs and brain were not getting enough oxygen. The doc told Andrei that Sasha had maybe one month. The next day Andrei called to say Sasha was dead. Sasha the Boy was gone for good. He never grew up.
-----------------------------------
I gave Stephen Crane another look. I thought about some of his famous quotes in light of his death and Sasha's death, both in their 20s, both from TB. 


I understood that the quotes speak for the two of them, but not for me, not for the one who knows in Whom his trust is secure, and has reason to seek to live a trustworthy life, becoming the recipient of trust, even by the desperate. In that there is hope. 


“In the desert I saw a creature, naked, bestial, Who, squatting upon the ground, Held his heart in his hands, And ate of it. I said: "Is it good, friend?" "It is bitter-bitter," he answered; "But I like it Because it is bitter, And because it is my heart.”
“A man said to the universe: "Sir, I exist!" "However," replied the universe, 
 
“The fact has not created in me a sense of obligation”
 
“He wishes that he, too, had a wound, a red badge of courage.”
 
“He saw that it was an ironical thing for him to be running thus toward that which he had been at such pains to avoid.”
Postscript-
Today, October 4, 2011, Sasha the Boy had his final earthly send off. We were there. Andrei, LaVerne and I. Sasha's two 'wives' were there, too. Natasha's parents and someone from Olya's family were there. And that was it - Sasha's family and friends. We were there at the morgue where the Orthodox priest gave a sermon of hope in the resurrection and eternal life, but I had no reason to believe that Sasha had put his hope in anyone, not even in God. (But only God knows.)


The priest then performed an ancient ritual with scripture, smoke and chants. It was both beautiful and ... well, I wondered if it was a farce, or at best a façade -- a pretense that all was well and would be well. I did not feel well.


We drove through town and out of town, following the rust-colored van that carried Sasha to the cemetery. We drove through the large hillside covered with graves until we reached the edge of a plowed field. There were freshly dug graves waiting for their new residents, bordering hundreds of fresh burials adorned with bright wreaths and flowers. 


There was one for Sasha, too.


The casket was lowered. The bulldozer buried Sasha in two moves. The gravedigger shaped the dirt into what looked like a casket. The cross with Sasha's name and dates was pushed into place. The wreaths and flowers were not enough to cover much of the dirt, but there they were. 


It was done. Sasha was in the ground. 


Sasha's gravesite




The few people who cared at all drifted away toward the vans. I lingered. I too left. Sorry Sasha. 
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Tuesday, October 4, 2011

The [above] is from a letter that I wrote Joel and Tiffany. They knew about Sasha, and maybe they had met him during a visit years and years ago. 

The letter got long and took on the character of a story. I realized that this story might be of interest to others. I shared it with a few who work with people, including someone who work with orphans in Ukraine. 

I thought it might be a story to share with other orphans and those who work with orphans, about a series of bad choices and their consequences, and how the story could have been different if the choices made were different. 

I did not write it for that purpose, but looking at what I wrote, I can see different analogies and strands that run through the story. I cannot expect our experience to be your experience. You will not read this in the way that I wrote it, but maybe there is something that will resonate with you. At the least, it is a glimpse into our lives in Simferopol, a glimpse into something that does not make it into our newsletters.

Blessings,
Georges and LaVerne Carillet